In my new year resolution, I did mentioned that I want to sustain a healthy relationship with my dear. So, I asked myself how is the relationship going and am I doing enough to build a good relationship. Yes, dear mentioned that I don't say "I love you" as often compare to the past. Yes, there is some arguments. In my opinion, a relationship is always prone to argument. It's how well both parties sort it out amicably and end of the day these are sorts of pointers that strengthen a relationship.
Constructive feedback is good. Consultative discussion is good. Analytical thoughts and sharing is good. Decision maker is good. Indecisiveness could create stress. Flexibility is a virtue... I am listing the different behavioural and styles. From this, it could mean different pattern of human when facing with similar situation.
An ANALYTICAL person like me might take longer time to analyse and is data driven. This means indecisiveness. It could also mean more careful when facing with situations. Also I have the NEUTRAL type of character whereby I am a good listener, patience and like to live in harmony.
Where as my dear is also ANALYTICAL and data driven. Basically, this means always cautious, be able to work alone and like to be precise. I felt that she also has a bit of DECISIVE traits.
By understanding this behavioural model, we can work out ways to understand each other and using different approaches when face with certain situation.
For example, an analytical person is always cautious and not willing to take risk. Well, perhaps we can change abit by accepting some calculated risk and accepting the fact that not all is perfect.
Well, I need to refer to the notes that kind of explain this Leonard Personality Inventory.
Let me explore more on this and what is important is I am willing to step to other people shoes and understand the situation. Equally important is effective communication. Also, not too sensitive on certain things. I just don't understand why I am so agitated sometimes. Maybe my subconscious mind is too negative that don't accept criticism.
I hope this will help me to build a healthy and sustainable relation with my dear. Off course this takes time and Rome is not build overnight.
Constructive feedback is good. Consultative discussion is good. Analytical thoughts and sharing is good. Decision maker is good. Indecisiveness could create stress. Flexibility is a virtue... I am listing the different behavioural and styles. From this, it could mean different pattern of human when facing with similar situation.
An ANALYTICAL person like me might take longer time to analyse and is data driven. This means indecisiveness. It could also mean more careful when facing with situations. Also I have the NEUTRAL type of character whereby I am a good listener, patience and like to live in harmony.
Where as my dear is also ANALYTICAL and data driven. Basically, this means always cautious, be able to work alone and like to be precise. I felt that she also has a bit of DECISIVE traits.
By understanding this behavioural model, we can work out ways to understand each other and using different approaches when face with certain situation.
For example, an analytical person is always cautious and not willing to take risk. Well, perhaps we can change abit by accepting some calculated risk and accepting the fact that not all is perfect.
Well, I need to refer to the notes that kind of explain this Leonard Personality Inventory.
Let me explore more on this and what is important is I am willing to step to other people shoes and understand the situation. Equally important is effective communication. Also, not too sensitive on certain things. I just don't understand why I am so agitated sometimes. Maybe my subconscious mind is too negative that don't accept criticism.
I hope this will help me to build a healthy and sustainable relation with my dear. Off course this takes time and Rome is not build overnight.
Dear, opps I am careless only found out your blog after so many days...
ReplyDeleteYes I can feel strongly must be something puzzle you that made you write a long message. I also can feel strongly you wanted to make this relationship works, I appreciate it.
Well like what you said there are arguements in every relationship. I dont see us any special that can totally avoid conflicts / arguements. I guess more importantly is what have we learnt from conflicts and moving forward relationship getting stronger instead of seeing it negatively.
Yes you are right at certain level we are quite similar kind of person but sometimes we also very different in opinion. I see the similaration pulled us together and the differences made the relationship more interesting, how about that??
And yes you are right I am decisive, inflexible & perfectionist. I might able to change at certain level but I wish you understand a total change of my character is not only impossible but also will turn out to become someone not me anymore, someone that I certainly cant accept or maybe you may not like also :p
Again, I understand our differences, I am putting effort to learn to accept as it is... I strongly believe LOVE can keep us stay together to learn, to accept, to face life hand in hand.
Cheers :)